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DoodleScribbles

Scribblings and scrawls of a hopeless romantic soul

What Visits In The Night?

alone, black and white, blanket, dark, depressed, girl, light, lonely, sad

What Visits In The Night?

She hides beneath the sheets
As if the fabric helps
To chase away the kiss
That memory has fetched
The bedroom door’s ajar
To let the nightmares out
That visits on her sleep
Within the midnight hour
MS


In response to dVerse’s MTB: Trimeter hosted by Frank with his piece, Blaming the Moon. This piece is inspired by a senryu entitled, Happening,  written by Davy  D.

Image Source: Favim

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19 thoughts on “What Visits In The Night?

Add yours

  1. I love these lines:-
    The bedroom door’s ajar
    To let the nightmares out

    Usually open doors at night signal spooky things but I love how you’ve made it into something escaping rather than entering.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I love this, Maria!

    Like

  3. When doors are open at night it prompts bad spirits to enter..lol..and its creepy…but; you made opening the door at night romantic rather than creepy..

    Like

  4. Intriguing! Makes me think the kiss is the nightmare, or a memory of a lover you’d rather not remember.

    Like

  5. Nice trimeter lines. The fabric doesn’t seem like it would help against memory but what else does one have? I also liked opening the door so the nightmares could go out.

    Like

  6. I like this poem Maria and love how you have put some depth into the poem I wrote.

    Like

  7. “She hides beneath the sheets
    As if the fabric helps” — like a child would. Grasping at straws… or fibers.

    “To chase away the kiss” — the kiss of death, the kiss of an ex-lover, an unwanted kiss?

    “The bedroom door’s ajar
    To let the nightmares out
    That visits on her sleep” — my take is that the third line is key here. We, the reader, are allowed our own take on this. Is a light left on in the hall, so when the nightmares come…? Are the nightmares something the poet voice conjures within her, and the open door somehow facilitates release…?

    Much here in very few words.

    Like

  8. “As if the fabric helps” – a good insight for many different emotions.

    Like

  9. This is a great write, and readily disposes of the nightmares!

    Like

  10. A beautiful piece Maria. I loved the imagery, the way the poem read like a sweet bedtime story.

    Like

  11. You rocked the prompt. with trimeters humming–i like the clear-eyed hope trumpeted here.

    Like

  12. Haunting, Maria. You write so well!

    Like

  13. Beautifully done, Maria. A tribute to the trimeter form.

    Like

  14. Oh my, this is stunning as ever, Maria!

    Like

  15. A beautiful poem. Leaving the bedroom open as an exit for nightmares – very brave.

    Like

  16. Ooooooooooh. The door ajar..chilling..chilling..misssss you heeere!!!

    Like

  17. A great poem…very descriptive and so much said with just a few words. Beautiful writing . 🙂

    Like

Go on... I'd love to hear your thoughts! ;)

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